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The Ultimate Beginner's Guide To Sex Toys

Hi, we’re UberKinky. Wanna play?

Well, there are certainly plenty of sex toys to choose from! But how do you know which one is right for you? Fear not you little kinksters, that’s where we come in! So, hands up if you’ve seen our fisting toys and are tempted to give them a try? We’re only playing; that’s a little extreme for our Beginner’s Guide. But there are certainly plenty of toys suitable for the naughty novice, so park your bum there folks, because you’re about to feel like a kid in a candy store!

Sex toys may once have been a taboo topic of conversation, but now you’re in the minority if you don’t own one. Considered a positive and healthy way to explore sexuality, isn’t it time you knew your strap on from your sex doll? Use alone, or with a friend, a sex toy is always ready to play when you come a-knocking!


Safety First!

It’s safe to say that this is mostly common sense. However, there are certainly some extremely important points worth mentioning!

Size matters (of course), but that’s not to say bigger is always better. Choose a product that you are comfortable with and take things slowly. Never make unrealistic demands of your body; otherwise it could lead to injury. If in doubt, and particularly if you’re new to sex toys, start small.

Before using any toy, it is important to check for any damage, faults, or special instructions. Additionally, make sure there are no sharp edges and ensure that battery operated functions are all in working order.

Sex toys are available in a variety of different materials, some safer than others. We recommend that you choose a non porous toy, which is free from latex and phthalates where possible. For more information regarding this, please take a look at our Beginner’s Guide to Sex Toy Materials.

We love to play with sex toys as much (more) than the next person, but remember; safety is no game!



  • Choose a toy that doesn’t contain latex or phthalates
  • Use a condom if toy contains latex or is porous
  • Use a lubricant that is compatible with your toy
  • Clean toys before and after every use
  • Properly sterilise non porous toys before sharing


  • Share porous toys
  • Use a toy that’s too big or small for your body
  • Deviate from the instructions or use a toy in a different manner than specified
  • Use toys in various holes without cleaning in between
  • Use broken or damaged toys

Types of Sex Toys

Not sure you have a type? Of course you do, you just don’t know what it is yet! Allow us to enlighten you as to the different sex toys available;



Searching for the ultimate buzz? Well, you’re guaranteed to be addicted after your very first go with a vibrator. Consisting of a motor and available in a variety of different shapes, sizes and designs, they are the most popular sex toy around. The majority of women will come from clitoral rather than g-spot stimulation. A vibrator has the capacity to stimulate both simultaneously, or one of the other. Choose from bullet vibrator, g-spot stimulator, magic wands and more. We promise; you’ll only get good vibes! View All Vibrators

cock ring

Cock Rings

It’ll feel like the happiest day of your life ;) A cock ring is perfect whether playing as a pair, or on your own. Not only does it put pressure on the base of the penis, providing unique and satisfying sensations, it also keeps erections stronger for longer by restricting blood flow out of the penis, enabling fellas to put in the performance of a lifetime. Not to mention the illusion it gives of greater girth and the sensational stretch for playmates. Trust us; a ring will come in really handy for your sex play! View All Cock Rings



Find something that really hits the ‘spot’! With so many to choose from, getting your hands on the right toy can be a real dildo dilemma. Dildos are perfectly contoured to deliver intense internal stimulation, some vaginally and others anally. With everything from Make Your Own Dildo to double ended dildos, there’s something to fulfil every deviant desire. Typically curved in such a way to stimulate the prostate/g-spot, they, unlike vibrators, only move as much as you move them yourself. You’ll find this toy is always up for it! View All Dildos

ipenis pump

Penis Pumps

Okay, with the help of this guide, you should be at least starting to size up your options? And, speaking of size, a delicious by-product of using a penis pump is that you can expect a marvellously massive manhood. That’s on top of the unique and intense sensations you’ll feel as it sucks your sausage. When the air pressure is decreased in the pumping cylinder a vacuum is created and, in order to fill this void, the penis expands. This also encourages blood to fill up the tissue, resulting in a fuller, more powerful and longer lasting erection. So, it’s both practical and gratifying... now, that has to have you pumped! View All Penis Pumps

butt plug

Butt Plugs

You can’t beat a bit of cheeky anal action, and these toys are perfect whether butt beginner or anal artiste. A tapered tip allows for easy insertion and a flared based ensures no venturing into the unknown. There is a vast array of butt plugs to choose from and they are crafted from a variety of different materials. Designed to tantalise the nerve endings and provide a supreme stretch, they can be worn whilst engaging in a little bit of oral, sex, or indeed when taking more of a hands on approach. Some of the smaller varieties can even be worn underneath clothing during day to day activities. It’s impossible not to plug them! View All Butt Plugs

anal beads

Anal Beads

Anal about your sex play? Then you’ve come up trumps here! Anal beads are a series of spherical balls that graduate in size and are inserted into your back passage, if you’ll excuse the jargon ;) The sphincter muscles then contract and relax around each individual bead, providing unique and intense sensations. Like butt plugs, you can enjoy other activities whilst your beads are in place, but dissimilarly, the real thrill occurs upon their removal. When the beads are taken out at the point of climax they stimulate all of the nerve endings on the way down. This makes for an extremely powerful orgasm. It’d be a bummer if you missed out! View All Anal Beads

sex doll

Sex Dolls

There’s no wining and dining necessary with a sex doll! So, now you can cut out all of the hard work and get straight down to business. Sex dolls have become increasingly popular over the years, which is largely down to the new and realistic materials that they are crafted from. Designs are more detailed, and there is a greater variety to choose from. Whether it’s the finished article you’re after, or you simply want to get your hands on the bits that matter, a sex doll ensures that you never feel lonely again. They have everything necessary to allow you your wicked way. These dolls are begging to be played with! View All Sex Dolls

prostate massagers

Prostate Massagers

If you feel like you’ve been getting a bit of a bum deal in your sex play of late, a prostate massager promises to really perk you up! Perfectly contoured to stimulate the p-spot, it massages the sensitive gland until climax is reached. A prostate orgasm is different from a normal orgasm as it lasts longer and the ejaculate is not forcefully expelled from your manhood. It is, however, reported to be even more intense and pleasurable. There are many prostate massagers to choose from, some even vibrate, for an added buzz. So, don’t be an ass; this is a toy that all men should get their hands on! View All Prostate Massagers

penis extenders

Penis Extenders

Longing for a little bit more when it comes to your sex play? Well penis extenders not only enable you (and your playmate) to experience what it’s like to have a bigger package, they are typically textured for added stimulation too. Not to mention the sensational suction you’ll feel when you put your new penis pal on. In addition, penis extenders are designed to keep your erection stronger for longer, meaning that you can fully satisfy your partner and put in the performance of a lifetime. So, don’t be thick, if you have big dreams, a penis extender is the perfect choice! View All Penis Extenders

male masturbators

Male Masturbators

Really enjoy your alone time? Well, there are plenty of sexual aids to ensure that you enjoy it even more! In fact, there is an entire range of sex toys designed specifically for men, to ensure that the fun just keeps on coming. Whether it’s portable pleasure, sensational suction, or lifelike action, you’re sure to find something that meets your needs, from masturbation sleeves to Fleshlights. Male masturbators are made from a variety of different materials, with unique textures to deliver supreme sensations, but our very favourites are TPR, TPE and silicone. When it comes to choosing though, you’re on your own! View All Male Masturbators

ben wa balls

Ben Wa Balls

Make sure you don’t drop the ball when it comes to choosing your sex toy! These little beauties are for vaginal insertion. Also known as ‘jiggle balls’, the slightest movement causes them to jiggle and move inside you. This provides scintillating vibrations that resonate throughout the entire body. However, if you keep them in place whilst you have sex, you’re in for a real treat. You could engage in a supreme spanking or some deviant pegging play to really make the most of the sensations on offer. And... if you’ve got the balls, you can even wear them out in public! View All Ben Wa Balls

BDSM toys

Bondage/BDSM Toys

You can’t beat a little bit of brutality! There are many BDSM toys to choose from, catering for those that wish to experiment with a little bit of light bondage to those that like all things extreme. BDSM toys include; furniture, gags, hoods, masks, blindfolds, clamps, suckers, restraints, slave collars, spanking implements and handcuffs, to name but a few. It’s important to only use toys that are right for you and that cater to your kinky preferences. Take a look at our many different guides and make sure you know exactly how to use them prior to playtime. BDSM toys guarantee to give you game! View All BDSM gear

strap ons

Strap Ons

Strap yourself in and prepare for a wild ride! If you want all the fun of a dildo whilst keeping the hands fee to pursue other perverted tasks, you’ve found just the right product. Think a strap on is just designed to be worn around the waist? Oh no! Now you can get everything from head strap ons to thigh strap ons. Available in many different designs, for both male and female wear, a strap on could be the toy of choice for you if you wish to engage in a little bit of pegging play, lesbian loving or simply if you wish to add a little length to your life. Perfect if the same old sexploits are wearing thin! View All strap onsr


Share & Share Alike

In the words of Snoop Dogg (Lion, or whatever it is he calls himself these days), “It ain’t no fun if the homies can’t have none”! Well Snoop, we’re all for sharing is caring here at UberKinky, but that is not entirely true. Indeed, if toys are porous we recommend that you keep them completely to yourself, as selfish as it may sound. On the other hand, non porous toys can be bandied about willy nilly, just so long as you thoroughly sterilise them between individuals and uses. You can make it that little bit easier by putting a condom on all insertable toys. Look for non porous, phthalate free toys and don’t spread STIs through easily avoidable bad habits.

Then you’re each guaranteed your fair share of fun!

Cleaning, Care & Storage

Cleaning, Care & Storage

Dirty minds shouldn’t mean dirty sex toys! So, if you don’t care much for cleanliness, it really is time to clean your act up.

Come on guys; dish the dirt, are your cleaning habits not what they could be? Well, not only does cleaning your sex toys prevent any health risks, it also prolongs their life and enables you to check for wear and tear. Remember to rinse your toys before insertion to stop cleaning chemicals coming into direct contact with those sensitive spots and be careful when touching toys that have been in the dishwasher or boiling water, scalding yourself on a metal toy can cause a LOT of pain. Plus, it’ll be fun explaining that one away.

If the toy is battery operated, we recommend that you remove prior to cleaning (especially if the toy is not waterproof) and storage. Removing before storage will prevent corrosion or accidental discharge. There’s nothing worse than reaching for your favourite vibe and realising your fun is dead in the water.

Proper storage means longer lasting sex toys that are clean and safe to use whenever you’re feeling in the mood. Keep them separated in individual lint-free microfibre bags, particularly jelly and silicone. All toys must be completely dry to avoid any mould and mildew (particular care needs to be taken with porous toys).

The only dirty little secret you should have is your perverted preferences!

For more information about how to clean your sex toys, check out our Beginner’s Guide to Sex Toy Materials.



Diamonds are forever, and so are sex toys if you care for them correctly!

Okay, so it’s not quite as simple as that, but it is definitely a major factor. In addition to care, how long a sex toy lasts depends largely on the material that it is made from. Some materials are much more durable than others. Indeed metal and glass toys can last you a lifetime with minimal care. Toys crafted from jelly and rubber are likely to be with you for a shorter period of time. They will be subject to chemical degradation over time, which no amount of care can prevent. You’ll know when it’s time to replace them as you will notice splits or breakages. Don’t use any toy that appears to be broken or damaged; you don’t want to risk injury or infection.

It is also important to note that battery operated toys are more susceptible to breakages; that’s just life!

Further Reading

Okay, you’re on your own! Don’t worry; we’re just toying with you. Be sure to take a look at these UberKinky Beginner’s Guides before getting stuck in;

Beginner's Guide to Sex Toy Materials

Beginner's Guide to Sex Toy Materials

Beginner's Guide to Lubricant

Beginner's Guide to Lubricant